Super Duper joke

Bill Gates organized an enormous session to recruit a new Chairman forMicrosoft Europe. 5000 candidates assembled in a large room. One candidate Is Raghu , an Indian guy.

Bill Gates thanked all the candidates for coming and asking those who doNot know JAVA programs to leave.2000 people leave the room.
Raghu says to Himself, "I do not know JAVA but I have nothing to lose if I stay. I'llGive it a try"

Bill Gates asked the candidates who never had experience of managing more Than 100 people to leave. 2000 people leave the room.
Raghu says to himself "I never managed anybody by myself but I have nothing to lose if I stay.What can happen to me?" So he stays.

Then Bill Gates asked candidates who do not have management diplomas toleave. 500 people leave the room.
Raghu says to himself , "I left school at 15 but what have I got to lose?" So he stays in the room.

Lastly, Bill Gates asked the candidates who do not speak Serbian - Croat toleave. 498 people leave the room. Raghu says to himself, " I do not speak one word of Serbian - Croat but whatdo I have to lose?" So he stays and finds himself with one other candidate. Everyone else has gone.

Bill Gates joined them and said "Apparently you are the only two candidates Who speak Serbo - Croat, so I'd now like to hear you have a conversation together in that language.

"Calmly, Raghu turns to the other candidate and says "En guru, aarama?"
The other candidate answers "Nann magane, Sooryange Torcha??"

Is a Foreign degree worth the trouble?

India and China send the most students abroad, with no other nation near these two global giants. Universities in the US, UK, Australia, Canada , Germany and New Zealand are all making serious efforts to recruit even more Indian talent. What do you make of this trend? Is it a positive sign? Is it good for India's future? What about the infamous brain drain? Does studying abroad contribute to the loss of Indian talent? How do you feel about it at a personal level? Between exorbitant osts, separation from family and the effects of culture shock, is obtaining a foreign degree a worthwhile pursuit?
I feel one should experience the college life abroad as it is totally different from Indian colleges and university. One becomes more independent and takes responsibility about his/her work at home and in school too. Here in India our children are spoilt as all the work at home is done by maids and so when they go to America they take charge and become more responsible and do their own Laundry and dishes and keep the room clean. I didnt do any work in India but when i went to Japan I had to take the challenge and responsibility and it changed me as a person. I was　not lazy anymore and became more active and started planning my life too.

Watch your wrist! Funky time keepers

For some, a watch is merely a means of telling time, for others it is a status symbol, and for a few it is a truly prized possession. Whatever your take on watches, you're sure to find one that appeals to you -- they come in a range of sizes, shapes, and prices. So how do you go about picking up one that suits your purpose?
How to choose a watch: You need to be clear about why you're buying a watch, in the first place -- do you want to wear it casually, to the office, on social outings, or on formal occasions? Once your purpose is clear -- casual, corporate, formal, or party wear -- the vast ranges available will still be sufficient to make your choice difficult! These days, it's primarily the brand of a watch that dictates its market standing.
1. For work: Steel-rimmed, round-dial watches look best on men in the office, while women can go for rectangular or square dials with silver/ steel or leather straps.
2. For casual wear: Leather and other fabrics add a casual touch to your time-keeper. Unisex watches are especially 'in' these days.
3. The 'sporty' look: If you're a sporty, outdoors kind of person, you may want to spring for a watch that features a timer, and is both water- and shock-resistant. These hardy time pieces are also resistant to sweat and moisture.
4. Party/ formal: bracelet type watches on women to something jazzy in steel look good on men.
As far as trends go at the moment, gold and gold-plated watches are not very much in demand, as compared to steel and sporty-looking pieces. However, it's mainly the watches which sport big brand-names like Tag Heuer and Swatch, that people go in for."
The youth is becoming so brand-conscious, even grey-market pieces that are not purchased from authentic retail outlets, and cheap imitations of expensive makes will do for them. Just so long as your watch is branded, that's all that matters

Dream definition

Bai? Gayi!!

You are running late for work again! You were supposed to leave 20 minutes ago. Everything is in order. Breakfast, getting ready, all office papers...everything. But you are still late. Why? Because she's not come yet! Who? The Bai!
She is the only piece of your lifestyle you share a consistent love-hate relation. She is perhaps the most important relation too! Because everything you do in you rlife actually revolves around "her" timings. You wake up, bathe, cook, use the bathroom, go to work...everything is as per her convenience. In fact your diet is also controlled by her. If she is not showing up tomorrow, you eat out!! She is the one wearing the pants in your house...really!　The average Indian has to learn to do without her soon. Why is she going to work for you when her son is already a "graduate" and working in a "foreign" company? So what if he is just a cleaner staff or clerk. The fact is that he is earning enough to support his family and hers. He is not going to go around telling his friends that his mother works as a bai. Oh no! So this affects im multiple ways:
1) Her fees go up.
2) She asks for a raise, sooner
3) She is not going to take any kind of behavior from you
4) She will have strict timings!
And all this will be implemented bottom-up. This will give rise to new found markets for products mostly used abroad. Carpets, Vacuum Cleaners, Dish Washers, Packaged Foods, Take-away ONLY restaurants, throw-away cutlery...the list can go on! The scenario of the average middle class will change and so will the lower classes. When a mobile phone is no longer the priviledge of the top, nothing will soon!　Brace the new world...the time has come to change.

Fun ways of dealing with telesales calls

Hello madam, we are pleased to inform you that you are eligible for a free gold credit card from our bank."
~"Good afternoon sir, are you looking to avail of a personal loan?"
~"Would you be interested in switching to our mobile network? We have a host of new benefits to offer customers, including..."
Which of us hasn't been plagued with annoying sales calls in recent years?
Everyone is fed up of them and while we are continually hearing about laws intended to curb such unwelcome advertising, we continue to remain at the receiving end, right?
So some Internet prankster came up with a number of humorous ways to get back at annoying telemarketing executives and has been circulating them through e-mail -- for those of you who haven't seen them yet, here they are!
10 fun ways to stop annoying telemarketing calls:
1. After the telemarketer finishes speaking, propose marriage to him/her. 2. Tell the telemarketer you are busy at the moment, and ask him/her, to give you his/her home phone number and cell number so you can call back maybe very late at night. 3. Keep asking the telemarketer to tell you his spiel all over again. Do this several times. 4. If you receive a call during a meal, tell the telemarketer that it's lunch time, but ask him/her to hold. Switch to loudspeaker mode and eat your food in a languid noisy fashion, chomping away and continuing with the conversation.
5. Tell the telemarketer that all business goes through your representative, and hand the phone to your five-year-old. 6. Say that you are hard of hearing and that he/she needs to speak up -- louder -- louder -- louder! 7. Tell the telemarketer to speak really really slowly because you want to write every word down. 8. If the telemarketer starts off with "How are you today?", say "I'm so glad you asked, because no one these days seems to care, and I have all these problems..." 9. Cry out in astonishment, "Johnny, is that you? I've been hoping you'd call! How is the family?" When he/she insists it's not Johnny, refuse to believe it and say, "Stop kidding me!" This works especially well if the telemarketer is female. 10. Tell the telemarketer to call at your office number and give him/her the number of a rival telemarketing organisation instead!

New at work

A sense of belonging is what everyone yearns for, while kicking off a new stage of life. You can become really cautious about settling into a new environment — especially at college or a new workplace, where you come in from a different world altogether. Thankfully, it can be made easy, if you just keep your head on your shoulders and are not too eager to judge people around you. Here's how you can do it.

Most first-timers at a job make the mistake of expecting too much out of the workplace. If you picture your seniors/colleagues to be of a certain character and prepare yourself for interacting with them, most of the times you will be disappointed. My friend, whose first job started a few months back at an agency called KPIT Communications, explains, "I consciously approached the job with an open mind, without any expectations - and it helped immensely. Secondly, many companies today, like mine, are youth-friendly. So the atmosphere itself has to work for you naturally - for socialising with others."

Also many of you might have started working soon after passing out of college. You may miss the freedom of campus and behave awkwardly in the first few weeks. This happened to someone even at Google, (one of the 'coolest' places to work at; according to The Google Story).

Value of Life in India

First thought came in my mind was whether I praised India or write something bad about things happening in India. It is one of the big Democratic country in the World. We are worship with Knowledge and Sanskriti. We will find all types of people in India. I just wanted to make a point do we have any Value for our life in India. I am a true Indian and respect my nation a lot but looking, reading in newspapers, watching TV people dying in Train Accidents, Cyclones,Floods,Earthquakes,Riots,Building Collapses,Fire,Road Accidents and the list goes on.... How a normal Human being can can stay safe. While traveling in trains you never know when you come across a train Accident only because of negligence of our Railway Authorities, A truck or a Bus can run over you anytime because of negligence of traffic police no proper mechanism to check speeds, We say you are safe when you are at your home but thanks to our builders & the concerned authorities who approve projects which the material used for building a house is of poor quality and anytime you can loose your house and family because the building can collapse anytime.

I know Natural calamities can not be predicted but why this condition came on India? Because in every field we are inventing some new things against Nature. For making our life we are inventing one thing which will cause other bad effects in one or another way. Natural calamities have no control but are any precautions taken by our Government no. The people who run our nation whom we call Government of India no matter is BJP,Congress or any other political party there one & only one goal is to earn money. If BJP and Congress to very big political parties of India claim that there main goal is to prosper India then why not get together and run the nation but they will not because power & money will be distributed which they do not want? Spending Crores of rupees in Campaigning during elections why do they need to spend this much during elections cannot you spend that money to prosper India, but they will not because the main objective is not to prosper out nation but to have Power and Money. We have people who are more than 60yrs of age running our nation who cannot think innovative, cannot think about future of India they cannot work more efficiently than a person who is 30 to 40yrs of age , we have people who are not even ever gone to school. Why cannot we have eligibility criteria in politics & today in India if a person has to enter any profession he has to fulfill the requirements and be eligible to join that profession why not politics?

No where I find discipline, safety? Everywhere people are involved in one or other case. Once they got power,they are misusing that power for their benecifiary part. Are the political party playing a majore role in moving India ahead in new era. What will be the future of next generations? Are we living in 20th century? What dreams our Freedom fighters thought about India and what are we doing? They are fighting for the people for freedom and we are just doing opposite to that.Terrisom is a common thing in India. Anybody will come with armed weapon and will served their purpose? People are just seeing the scenario. Police departments are there but what is the use?People do not have any fear about police?There will be lakhs of cases are pending in the courts and nobody will even bouther about that.

Tax is being a big issue in India. We are payinh hell lot of taxes on every small things. Whats the use? Are we getting the facilities for which we are deserved? We pay taxes for each and everything but we get nil service from our government. Government asks for each and every account where we sent money does the government gives any statement or account where they spending the money for better future for India. I want to ask people of India does this country has some future? Do we see any value for life for us and our family here in India? When will the nation Change when we will stop fighting for religion & when will we have no destruction during Natural Calamities it will only happen when Politics will end in India, corruption will end in India but is that possible?

Earthquake in Japan

The earthquake, which measured six-point-eight on the Richter Scale, hit Japan's north west coast on Monday morning. In the city of Kashiwazaki, residents described being violently shook. Officials there say 2,000 people were evacuated from their homes. The city's modern buildings, as elsewhere in the earthquake prone country, are built to withstand tremors, but the older, mostly timber buildings were reduced to rubble.
Of most concern though, was the damage to the Kashiwazaki nuclear power station. But Yasuhisa Shiozaki, the Chief Cabinet Secretary, said there was no immediate danger.
"At the Nuclear Power plant, the Third, Fourth and Fifth reactors automatically shut down. There is a fire at the transformer building outside the main reactors, but we have confirmed that there was no nuclear leak."
As aftershocks continued to hit, the Prime Minister Shinzo Abe announced he'd cancel election campaigning in southern Japan and head to the area. Richard Lloyd Parry, a journalist for The Times, told the BBC he clearly felt the earthquake in Tokyo, some 250 kilometres away.
"I'm on the third floor of a concrete building, and it was like being on a ship at sea for about forty seconds or so, and the utility poles, the wires outside the window were all shaking. Over in Niigata prefecture, and especially in Kashiwazaki where most of the damage occurred, it must have been really something, I mean, people there say they couldn't stand up, it was like being on a storm-tossed boat."
Japan sits on four tectonic plates and is well prepared against its frequent earthquakes. An earthquake in Kobe in 1995 killed more than 6,000 people. The last major quake in Tokyo hit in 1923 and killed 142,000.

...तभी परमाणु संयंत्र चालू हो-अमारी

टोक्यो- जापान के वाणिज्य मंत्री अकिरा अमारी ने टोक्यो इलेक्ट्रिक पॉवर कॉरपोरेशन से कहा कि भूकंप से हुए नुकसान के बाद सुरक्षा संबंधी मानकों की पुष्टि के बाद ही कशीवाजाकी करीवा परमाणु संयंत्र को कामकाज फिर से शुरू किया जाए।टीईपीसीओ के प्रवक्ता ने कहा कि वाणिज्य मंत्री ने टीईपीसीओ के अध्यक्ष तुसूनिहिसा कटसूमाता से कहा कि जब तक सुरक्षा के पुख्ता इंतजाम नहीं कर लिया जाए तब तक परमाणु संयंत्र को चालू नहीं किया जाना चाहिए।गौरतलब है कि जापान में सोमवार को आए भूकंप में नौ लोग मारे गए थे और 900 से ज्यादा घायल हुए थे। भूकंप के कारण दुनिया के सबसे बड़े परमाणु संयंत्र में आग लगने और हल्के विकिरण की खबर सामने आई थी।इसमें कहा गया था कि समुद्र का 1.2 क्यूबिक मीटर पानी संयंत्र से निकले विकिरण के प्रभाव में आ गया लेकिन इससे पर्यावरण पर कोई प्रभाव नहीं पड़ा। इस परमाणु संयंत्र में सात परमाणु रिएक्टर हैं।प्रवक्ता ने बताया कि संयंत्र बंद होने से इस सप्ताह बिजली की कोई कमी नहीं होगी और हम अगले सप्ताह स्थिति की समीक्षा करेंगे।परमाणु कचरे के ड्रमों के ढक्कन खुले : भूकंप के बाद कशीवजाकी-करिवा परमाणु ऊर्जा संयंत्र के टीईपीसीओ में रखे कम विकिरण वाले परमाणु कचरे के करीब 100 ड्रमों के ढक्कन खुल गए है।

Beauty Of Mathematics!!!!

1 x 8 + 1 = 9
12 x 8 + 2 = 98
123 x 8 + 3 = 987
1234 x 8 + 4 = 9876
12345 x 8 + 5 = 98765
123456 x 8 + 6 = 987654
1234567 x 8 + 7 = 9876543
12345678 x 8 + 8 = 98765432
123456789 x 8 + 9 = 987654321

1 x 9 + 2 = 11
12 x 9 + 3 = 111
123 x 9 + 4 = 1111
1234 x 9 + 5 = 11111
12345 x 9 + 6 = 111111
123456 x 9 + 7 = 1111111
1234567 x 9 + 8 = 11111111
12345678 x 9 + 9 = 111111111
123456789 x 9 +10= 1111111111

9 x 9 + 7 = 88
98 x 9 + 6 = 888
987 x 9 + 5 = 8888
9876 x 9 + 4 = 88888
98765 x 9 + 3 = 888888
987654 x 9 + 2 = 8888888
9876543 x 9 + 1 = 88888888
98765432 x 9 + 0 = 888888888

Brilliant, isn't it?And finally, take a look at this symmetry:

1 x 1 = 1
11 x 11 = 121
111 x 111 = 12321
1111 x 1111 = 1234321
11111 x 11111 = 123454321
111111 x 111111 = 12345654321
1111111 x 1111111 = 1234567654321
11111111 x 11111111 = 123456787654321
111111111 x 111111111=12345678987654321